Quieting Your Child's Nervous System

We talk a lot in our weekly conversations about tips for staying regulated and supported in parenthood so this week we spent time sharing ideas for helping little ones respond to overstimulation and overwhelm. It can sometimes be surprising and hard to discern from other behaviors. Most often it looks like: requests for increased attachment or connection, fear, aggression, resistance, disconnection and irritation (by no means an exhaustive list).

Like adults, there can be obvious triggers and some less obvious sources for overstimulation: packed schedules, traveling, new baby, new school, loud environments, crowded spaces, surprising or unexpected experiences, too many toys and screens plus being tired or hungry certainly doesn’t support them to be able to regulate their bodies. It’s helpful to stay curious about your child’s unique responses to the world and how you can begin to predict overwhelming moments and also support them through the moment with connection and empathy. 

Some suggestions shared: 

• Close contact, hugs, nursing and extra love

• Going outside, ideally into nature 

• Getting into water like a bath or even water play

• Reducing sensory input: sounds, light, screens, less toys, space from others, sound canceling headphones

• Taking deep breaths together

• Soothing sounds: singing, quiet music, nature sounds, mantra

• Sensory play sometimes help: bin of dried rice, corn or beans or sand play

• Sometimes art is soothing therapy

• Adjust your routine or your plan according to their needs: more time in the morning or more time for the transition, more time for sleep, avoiding loud public spaces, attending a smaller playgroup or day care, avoiding parks at peek times, and really listening when they tell you they’re uncomfortable in a specific space. 

• Providing clear expectations for the day along with the tools they may need for greater success.

It can be surprising sometimes to find the origin of a child’s behavior including resistance and aggression. When they’re overstimulated, sometimes we’re also overstimulated so it can be challenging in the moment to find curiosity and connection to meet everyone’s needs. The more you get to know your unique child and what supports them to feel confident and comfortable, the more predictable these moments become. 

Feel free to share your favorite regulating tools and steps here with our community!